Some Rules Are Broken

To varying degrees of success, we have always tried to hold Matthew to the same standard that we held Alyssa and Jackson (at that age).  That mostly works, but sometimes, what worked for the big kids just doesn't work for Matthew.  My parenting tool box sometimes feels light when dealing with Matthew.  

Example 1:  Time outs have lost effectiveness with the big kids, but taking away privileges still does the trick.  For Matthew, it is the exact opposite.  Sometimes that causes feelings of unfairness. After a rumble, I may take away Wii time from Jackson, but give Matthew a time out.  One time when Jackson was particularly upset by the perceived injustice in punishment, Jack asked me to take away Matthew's iPad.  I put it on top of my dresser and it spent well over a month there.  Matthew never noticed it was gone. Not exactly a consequence that deters or encourages, well, anything.  Though I want to hold Matthew to the same standard, I have to do what works.  Time outs are really the only tool in my tool box for him.

Example 2:  Dinner time has always consisted of two options-- take it or leave it.  We have held this steady through 10 years of feeding children.  Lately, Matthew has made us rethink that edict though.  Every day, when we pick them up from after school care, Matthew is hangry.  Very hangry.  After a year of this, making almost every evening unbelievably unpleasant because we can't make dinner fast enough, I gave up.  I started packing him a dinner in the morning, so he can eat as soon as he gets home.  And though it breaks our original rule, and the standard to which we hold Alyssa and Jackson, it has made our household a much more enjoyable place to be between the hours of 5-7pm.  I guess some rules are meant to be broken-- for the greater good!

We know Matthew will be different from Alyssa and Jackson, like in the examples above, but in most instances, he's pretty similar.  The challenge is finding which instances are which.  

Matthew loves the new routine!  

Don't Blink

Not sure how it has been almost 2 months since I last posted, but I guess I blinked and the time went by faster than I ever imagined. 

Thankfully March and April were vastly improved over February!  Since I last posted, we went on a cruise with dear friends, we enjoyed time off for Spring Break and visits with family and friends. We started soccer (for Aly and Matt) and flag-football (for Jax), and then hosted a crawfish boil. We continued school, and work, and scouts, and piano, and so on.  

Now it is just a mad rush to the end of the school year.  Happy spring!

Review of February

February was a bit rough--

We passed around a stomach bug.
The dog was diagnosed with cancer with few treatment options available.
Matthew ran a mystery fever for 4 days, due to an ear infection.
and I got what looked to be a spider bite on my forehead.

But the month had lots of awesome moments too--

Matthew met 2 of his Language Arts goals for the year (7 months early).
We had a great time at the Cub Scout Pinewood Derby, where Jackson (and Darren) came in 1st in his den (though didn't place in the finals).  

Family and friends celebrated Matthew's sixth birthday.

And we are done selling Girl Scout cookies, where Alyssa was excited to "earn" Mr. Moos (a little stuffed cow).  

Piano Lessons

Six years ago, I sat staring at my newborn's hands.  I was still in shock over his missing thumbs.  I wondered if I would ever stop staring at them or seeing them as different. A few months later, I realized I stopped seeing his hands as unusual.  A year later, I started counting other kids' fingers because they looked like they had too many (they had 5).  

Even though Matthew's missing thumbs had become a norm for us, I still feared there would be things that Matthew wouldn't be able to do because of his missing thumbs, like play the piano. In an episode of M*A*S*H, a professional pianist injured his hand in the battlefield and the cultured doctor who loved music, Winchester, found the soldier/pianist a few pieces made to be played with one hand. We have found that like this episode, music "is in your head and in your heart and in your soul" and it takes the right person willing to help.  For Matthew, that is Ms. Rebekah, who is also Alyssa and Jackson's piano teacher. I am so grateful for her!  Mattie may not be a professional pianist, but he loves music and now gets to explore it. He loves going to lessons and I love hearing him plink out his few notes as he practices. Thank goodness for those willing to see the possibilities!  

Happy Sixth Birthday, Matthew!

Today, Matthew turned 6.  Six!  It was a fun day, perfect for the fun-loving boy.  

Our sweet Matthew loves...

Playing outside
Bouncing a basketball
Throwing a football
Riding his bike
Going to school
Riding in Daddy's convertible
Watching Mickey Mouse
Eating french fries
Petting the dog (or seeing any dog)
and being with his friends and family.

Every day is a good day for Matthew, but it was especially good today!  

January 5 Smiles, 1 Frown

+1. Matthew graduated to a bigger bike and had no problem navigating our block with his training wheels.  

+2.  We received our political shirts for the upcoming election. This is as political as we get! (Yes, we are big Star Wars geeks.)

+3.  At least a dozen years ago, I fell in love with and bought a Mickey Mouse poster and then spent way too much money to have it framed. It has hung in my house ever since, and I smile every time I look at it now hanging in Matthew's room. It was worth it.

+4.  Alyssa loves her room, more than she loves any room in the house. I think (hope) it is because we have made it to fit her, not that she's becoming a tween.  (No, not yet!)

+5.  I took a 'mommy photography' class to improve my pictures of the kids.  They aren't always willing subjects, but our dog Padme loves attention.  I caught this picture last weekend, 

just before...

-1.  Padme had an emergency spleenectomy for internal bleeding caused by a tumor on her spleen. She was at the emergency vet for 4 days and has been home now for 24 hours. She seems to slowly be on the mend.  We are hoping the tumor was benign, as the surgery would be curative.  We hope.

PJ Day

The school day that causes me the most consternation-- pajama day.  The kids love wearing their pjs to school.  This seems to be the favorite 'reward' for the class and it makes me crazy.  My kids don't have 'going out' pajamas.  If they did, they wouldn't want to wear them on pj day.  They only want to wear their favorite pajamas, which means they wear faded and likely misfitting pajamas that day.  Definitely not something I'm excited sending them to school wearing!

Mickey Mouse pjs are the favorite.
It was these or the footed ones, neither a good choice!