In Honor

As I stood in the corral at the 10k on Saturday waiting for the gun to go off to start the race, I was overcome with emotion and tears fell down my cheeks.  I'm sure that the other participants around me thought I was nuts.  

When I started running last year, it was the day before Matthew's first birthday.  After that first year, full of surgeries and close calls, I've dedicated my runs to Matthew.  But I've wondered (and feared) if some day I would be running in memory of him instead of in honor of him.  A year ago, that seemed like a real possibility.  But now, I can't even imagine.  He is so strong, so vibrant, and so amazing.

I can't really see the scary stuff in the rear view mirror anymore. I know it is back there, but it has been a year since Matthew's last overnight hospital stay and almost a year since his last surgery.  He turned the corner and he has been on a nice straight away for quite some time. 

I am very aware that Matthew is still considered "medically fragile" and there might be a day where he turns a sharp corner and falls off a cliff.  But right now, I just can't see it.  I pray for a long, open road for Matthew's future journey. And last Saturday, and every day, I am beyond thankful that I run in honor of my sweet (and strong) baby Matthew.