Sunday, December 16, 2012

Newtown Tragedy

I usually listen to CNN on XM anytime I am in the car.  On Friday, I decided to listen to Christmas music instead. I was giddy on Friday-- it was the 7th anniversary of the day I became a mom, my big girl's birthday, and I was done for the semester with only the task of turning in my grades left.  I sung along to the radio as I went up to Alyssa's school to eat lunch with my birthday girl, and then as I returned to my campus to turn in my final grades.  My heart was light.  I switched the radio to CNN, during a rare commercial on the country Christmas channel, and heard the horrible news about the elementary school shooting.  My heart sank to my feet.  I had a moment of realization that although I have worried many days and nights about losing Matthew, it is not something I have ever consider about Alyssa or Jackson.  I imagine those parents never considered it either.  I can only imagine their anguish.

Those 20 little kids were Alyssa's peers-- first graders, 6 and 7 years old.  I can't imagine losing my Alyssa- who loves reading, coloring, macaroni and cheese with broccoli, and math problems.   Nor my Jackson- who gives the best hugs, loves to laugh, and runs all out through life.  I imagine those 20 weren't much different. 

We have learned that life is full of the unexpected, but this tragedy just seems beyond comprehension.  My heart hurts for their pain and anguish.  Since I've heard, I've hugged Aly, Jax and Mattie a bit harder. Tomorrow, I will be sending their teachers cookies because I know they care for my kids just like the teachers that were lost on Friday did their students. 

Rest in peace.

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