Thursday, October 11, 2012


I looked at Matthew today and noticed he was wearing one of Jackson's old shirts.  Really this shouldn't have come as a surprise as most of Matthew's wardrobe was Jackson's.  But today it struck me that Matthew is now the same age as Jackson was when Matthew was born.  I remember Jackson wearing that shirt in one of Matthew's newborn pictures.  It took me back and I couldn't help but to make comparisons from Jackson at that age to Matthew at this age.  I know we are on a different journey with Matthew, but sometimes the difference is jarring. I texted Darren with my observation that Matthew is now Jackson's age at Matthew's birth.  His response reminded me of what matters most-- "Our miracle baby has made it to toddlerhood!" 

Though Matthew is fully in toddlerhood, I do worry that maybe I am holding Matthew back, that since he is still the baby of the family, that I've allowed him to be a baby longer.  He will always be my sweet baby Matthew!  I think this is a concern for every parent -- how much do I push, how much should I expect, and how much should I help, how much should I accept?  This has been a struggle of balance for us with Alyssa and Jackson, but like many other things, it is exacerbated in Matthew by his uniquenesses. 

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