We had planned on going out to eat with Matthew's uncle Bryan, and would need a pass out of the hospital for the evening, so I just had them extend the pass so that we could stay gone for the night and come back in the morning. Matthew and I would have a better chance of a good night's rest in a hotel for the night. We'd be staying at the hospital after surgery, no need to do so before hand.
We had a nice dinner with Bryan, headed back to the hotel for one last bath before a 6 week period of sponge baths, and then bed. Matthew was not pleased at all with the hotel or pack and play, so he screamed for almost an hour. Finally at 8:30pm, it was quiet. Ahhhh...
|Mattie did enjoy his bath|
What ifs ran through my mind faster than Matthew can crawl. Meanwhile, Matthew coughed a bit more. I was concerned, but was still planning to take Matthew in for his surgery and let the nurses assess him that morning. And Matthew cried and coughed a bit more. I prayed-- "Please God, give me a sign. Let me know one way or another if the time for surgery is now." Then, Matthew coughed a few more times and proceeded to let out his bloody murder cry. As not to wake the entire hotel, I pulled him into my bed to calm him down and hopefully get a few minutes (hours seemed like too much to hope for) of sleep.
As I lay listening to my sweet baby Matthew fall asleep next to me, I heard the faint rattle of congestion coming from his chest. Thank you, God, for letting me know that today was not the day.
Instead of surgery, Matthew and I drove the 4 hours back from Dallas today. I have already second guessed my decision to cancel-- "Does he really have a cold or was it just allergies or the air conditioning in the room?" but I would rather second guess not doing it today rather than wish that we hadn't gone through with it. This is an elective procedure. One that can be done anytime from ages 2-72. We still think this surgery would make life a bit easier for Matthew. But this reprieve has given us pause to reconsider-- what about the risks? what if surgery doesn't go as expected (4 out of Matthew's 6 haven't)? is this the right age for this surgery? is this the right hospital/doctor? is this the right decision?
Just because today didn't go according to our plans, doesn't mean it wasn't to plan. Today was our last opportunity for the surgery before summer. They advise against getting the cast sweaty (germs and all) and with summer coming up, that would be unavoidable. Plus, we don't want to be land locked for 6 weeks in the summer. So, the next time to reschedule would be at the end of the summer. That will give us time to reconsider all the questions that give us pause before a new date.
Many thanks to all of those that have thought and prayed for our sweet baby Matthew and this surgery. We know that prayer is powerful-- and have seen it time and time again, especially in our sweet baby Matthew. Thank you!