Thursday, February 16, 2012

Dumb

I recently read an article that asked "Do you think that you are dumb or do you think that you are smart?"  The premise is that if you think you are smart, you likely don't know what you don't know (and therefore are not as smart as you think you are).  If you think you are dumb, you likely do know what you don't know (and therefore are really the more knowledgeable).  

If we had stopped at 1 kid, leaving Alyssa an only child, I would probably have felt like a pretty smart parent.  Now that we have 3, I can say that I am a dumb parent.  I am reminded almost every moment of every day that there is so much that I don't know about parenting, about children, about life, and the such.  I am continually humbled by our 3 very different children.

I'm not sure how we can have 3 polar opposite children, but we do.   Some differences might be a function of age, but some appear to be personality.  Examples:

"Have a good day!"
- Alyssa hears "have a good day" and says "I will make it a good day."  She works at it. 
-Jackson is asked "do you want to have a good day or a bad day?" and he answers "a bad day".
-And unless recovering from major surgery or currently throwing up, every day is a good day for Matthew. 

School
-Alyssa loves school, and is joyful on school day mornings. We pass by her school on the weekends, and she'll say "Hi school, see you Monday!"  She loves school and school work.
-Jackson says he 'hates' school.  Every morning he asks "is today a school day?" If the answer is "yes", he'll moan and complain.  He'd rather laugh, run, and play all day.  Though he does seem to enjoy school once he gets there.
-Too early to tell how Matthew will feel about school, but he takes on every day, every task with his sweet disposition and strong will.  I hope that continues.

Difficulties
-If Alyssa can't do something, she tries a few times and then asks for help.
-If Jackson can't do something, he tries once and gets frustrated (either low level "ugh" or high level flip out). I hope this is a phase.
-If Matthew can't do something, he tries a few times, bangs on it a second and then gets distracted and does something else. 

Their Personalities
-If Alyssa was a Care Bear, she'd be mix between Friend Bear and Smart Heart Bear.
-If Jackson was a Care Bear, he'd be a mix between Laugh A Lot Bear and Grumpy Bear.
-If Matthew was a Care Bear, he'd be Tenderheart Bear and Sweet Sakura Bear.
(For a description of the bears, click here.)

They are so very different.  I'm working to be a competent parent to these 3 great kids, and I worry about all 3 of them for very different reasons.  I pray that their teachers, their friends and everyone that they come in contact with will appreciate them for the unique beings they are.

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